what we made.

the planets must have aligned 
when you thought everything was fine
because then i knew something had to be wrong.

not wrong. just not right. now. 

if it was wrong, i would have noticed it long before
& i wouldn't have cried making the appointment.

maybe you knew & that's why you
kept your back to me
when we slept. 

because you only wanted to hold me.

its better that you didn't 
because it wouldn't have been right
though i doubt it could feel your embrace
but no doubt it would be engulfed by your energy.

that's probably why i never felt it.
there was nothing foreign to my body.
because it wasn't part of a stranger, or some man 
i didn't truly love.

it was entirely me. 

and now that i know it's there
i can't stop feeling it.
and i can't leave it
or give it away.
i can't see it
or let it grow.
it has to go.
and i almost want to protect it at the same time. 
because it's you and it's me
in a place we've never been. 

and there's sunlight & simplicity-
draped in innocent cotton linen.